Top 10 Christmas Gift Ideas For George W. Bush-Haters
This isn’t a post that casts judgment on the sitting President. This blog, after all doesn’t concern itself with inane things such as politics. All this is solely to help people who have family and friends who aren’t happy with President George W. Bush buy them Christmas gifts that will not only make them happy about the way they feel about the President, but give them a chance to get back in their own small way at Dubya for whatever offense, real or imagined, he has committed against them.
So if you think your friend or relative would be delighted to wipe his ass with the President’s face or see him burn slowly, here’s your chance to get him/her the perfect Christmas gift/s.
10. Bush Bottle Opener
For only $9.95, you can hear Dubya mangle the English language with every beer bottle you open.
9. Bush Goo Bah Stress Toy
If you think the policies of the Bush administration is stressing you out, the Bush Goo Bah Stress Toy can help take some of that stress away. Squeeze this stout and squishy stress ball to your heart’s delight while thinking about the President’s latest blunder, and strengthen your grip at the same time. You can get this one for $9.99.
UPDATE: Production of this product has been discontinued by the manufacturer.
8. Battling Bush 3-D bop bag
Smacking the hell out of George W. Bush could be therapeutic, but there is a downside to the Battling Bush 3-D bop bag: it keeps bouncing back! But then again, Bush-haters could derive great pleasure from punching this $18.00 toy over and over again, so I guess it would be fine with them if it doesn’t stay down.
7. Bush Voodoo Doll
I just love how the product tagline says: "Stick It to Him Like He's Been Sticking It to You!" For $20, you can get the chance to turn Dubya into a pin cushion. And it becomes even better if you actually practice voodoo.
6. Bush Political Pet Toy
Bush-haters say this country is going to the dogs. They’d definitely love seeing Dubya go to the dog, or rather, inside the mouth of a dog. The chewable George W. Bush Political Pet Toy is made from long-lasting PVC that guarantees long-term chewing fun for your dog, and years of satisfaction for you. Sells for $12.95.
5. The Burning Bush Fire Starter
It’s funny how a testimonial for this product quotes Moses as saying "The only good bush is a burning bush". See the President’s face burn slowly while keeping yourself warm by the fireplace this Christmas. Yours for only $9.95 each.
4. Bush Bowl Buddy
If you’ve given up on President Bush cleaning up his act, at least give him the chance to clean your toilet bowl up with the Bush Bowl Buddy. This $19.95 toilet bowl brush is good for scraping off crap, not spouting them.
3. Bush Toilet Paper
The President’s face, plus classic Dubya quotes, on toilet paper. Enough said. One roll costs $9.99
2. The Bushplug
Let the copy for this product speak for itself:
This President will really f*** you up the butt. You’re already familiar with the sensation, so why not REALLY FEEL IT with our exclusive Presidential Pooper Plug? Invade an Iraqi, an Afghani, or at even an Iranian when you want. With this fat headed, huge stub of a plug no ass is safe anywhere.
UPDATE: The seller has been ordered to cease and desist from selling this product.
1. “Death of a President” DVD
The ultimate fantasy for those who absolutely hate President Bush. And it’s an apparently well-made film too.
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