Thankfully, the more recent Summer Olympic games didn’t carry such weird sports from the early days of the modern Olympiad. After all, who really wants to see people win medals for crazy events such as tug-of-war (yes, it was an Olympic sport from 1900-1920) or live pigeon shooting?
The Olympics as we know it today, however, could still use a bit more housecleaning and scrap more events from its calendar. The ongoing 2008 Beijing Games would have been better off without these sports that are pretty much pointless in a stage as great as that of the Olympics.
1. Anything Equestrian
There’s a reason why the 2003 film “Seabiscuit” was titled that way, and not “Red Pollard”, the jockey that rode the legendary horse. In any sport that involves our equine friends, it’s these powerful and beautiful creatures that do the work. If they insist on keeping such inane events as show jumping and dressage in the Olympics, they should give credit where credit is really due and give the medals to the horses.
2. Beach Volleyball
Sure, this sport offers lots of eye candy with all those skimpy outfits, but what if a landlocked country without beaches suddenly gets to host the Olympics?
3. Synchronized Swimming
Yeah, yeah, synchronized swimming takes a lot of skill, talent, grace, whatever. It’s been in the Olympics since 1984, but the point of showing and giving medals to people who are able to dance in the water like a bunch of tailless dolphins with nose clips and swimming caps has yet to be made.
4. Synchronized Diving
Is having two people dive prettily at the same time such a big deal that it deserves an Olympic event of its own?
5. Rhythmic Gymnastics
Cirque du Soleil, yes. Olympics, no.
6. Table Tennis
There’s just something funny about two or four grown men and women hunched over a small table and hitting a barely visible ball with all their might, especially when the game speeds up.
7. BMX
In what could only be a pathetic attempt to woo younger audiences hooked on the X-Games, the IOC decided to include BMX in the 2008 Beijing Olympics. While they’re at it, they might as well make skateboarding and surfing an Olympic sport.
8. All other swimming strokes besides freestyle
Swimming is to water as running/walking is to land. If swimming needs to have various strokes to make the sport seem more interesting than it really is, then let’s do the same for track events. Anyone up for 100m-with-one-arm-tied-behind-your-back dash or the with-both-hands-making-the-thumbs-up-sign marathon?
9. Racewalking
The sight of skinny people on TV who looked like they were rushing to the crapper cracked me up as a child. Not much has changed a couple of decades later.
Image Sources
Equestrian2008 ReligiousFreaks TheWe CBC DrJump PongPlayer NBCSanDiego ClearLeadInc TheBeijinger
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